The Relationship Timeline of Questions

I had lunch today with my good friend, Ms. A, who updated me on a new man in her life that she's been dating for about two months now. She was informing me that she has been a little frustrated with the relationship because it's been moving at a slower pace then what she's use to. Basically she isn't sure if they are dating other people or if this new relationship is at the "exclusive-dating" stage. When I suggested she just ask him what's his thoughts were, she mentioned she was worried she would look "pushy.". . . So naturally this got me thinking:

When is the right time in a relationship (new or long-term )to ask questions about the "next-step"?

For example, Mr. S and I have been dating for three years now. Though we have taken our time to grow and mature before considering marriage, lately I have been wondering when he thinks we will get married. I'm not fishing for a ring or trying to pressure him - believe me I'm not ready to walk down the aisle yet - I just want to know if he sees an "us" in his future. Though I got an answer that had something to do with cooking spaghetti, I still feel like there is nothing wrong with asking whatever question might be on my mind. But in the situation I mentioned earlier, Ms. A feels she can't ask about her new relationship without facing the possibility of messing it up.

So this raises more questions:

Are there different rules for those in new relationships compared to those in a long-term relationship? And, can you only talk about certain topics when you're at a particular point in a relationship?

I've always thought of the "dating" as a time to get-to-know one another. To me almost all questions are free game at that point because if you find out something you don't like, then you're are free to exit at your own pleasure. But, if you don't ask about where you stand in a relationship, then you could end up wasting a lot of time thinking you're at one step when you're partner maybe two steps behind you.

So, my advice to Ms. A is to suck-it-up and ask the new man.

But, I'd like to hear from you. What are your thoughts on the relationship timeline of questions?